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Friendship with oneself is all-important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world.
In recovery, perhaps first we make peace with ourselves, and not until later do we become our own friends. We have been at war with ourselves and in turmoil with our families, even while feeling like victims. This program lays out Twelve Steps we can follow to become friends with ourselves. In recovery we may still feel self-hate when we constantly monitor our every action, when we react to our mistakes by berating ourselves, and when we dwell on past offenses. Would we put a friend through that?
A true friend will accept you as you are. He doesn’t put you down or call you derogatory names. He’ll give you honest feedback and won’t put on a false front. He’ll support you when you’re in trouble. Being our own friend means doing these things for ourselves. Perhaps we can even embrace and be kind to the part of ourselves that is addicted and codependent.
Today, I will be a friend to my whole self – even the parts of me I have rejected.
From Touchstones: A Book of Daily Meditations for Men ©1986, 1991 by Hazelden Foundation. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher.
I’m craving a distraction. I know I desperately need to clean, and all I can think about is what Star Wars Lego kit I could buy. There really aren’t any for sale right now that I even want.
Service call at 12:30am. Got home about 2:30. 3:30 now, wide awake. Work at 9am.
So, I bought a new car this week. A 95 Camry, this one a 4 door with a 3.0 V6. It’ll probably roll over to 52K miles tomorrow or Monday.
I’m in some sort of feeling mode, because all that money spent hasn’t sated me. I ran all over Appleton this afternoon, looking for a Star Wars Lego set to put together (almost bought the Star Destroyer kit… which is enormous). Now I’m thinking of running to the Walmart across town to look at their collection of Legos, and a jump drive for my car to play music from.
What am I trying to avoid? Retail therapy sucks.