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I’m craving a distraction. I know I desperately need to clean, and all I can think about is what Star Wars Lego kit I could buy. There really aren’t any for sale right now that I even want.
Forget relationships and learn how to relate.
Once you are in a relationship you start taking each other for granted — that’s what destroys all love affairs. The woman thinks she knows the man, the man thinks he knows the woman. Nobody knows either! It is impossible to know the other, the other remains a mystery. And to take the other for granted is insulting, disrespectful.
To think that you know your wife is very, very ungrateful. How can you know the woman? How can you know the man? They are processes, they are not things. The woman that you knew yesterday is not there today. So much water has gone down the Ganges; she is somebody else, totally different. Relate again, start again, don’t take it for granted.
And the man that you slept with last night, look at his face again in the morning. He is no more…
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The more we connect with a bigger perspective, the more we connect with energetic joy. Exertion is connecting with our appetite for enlightenment. It allows us to act, to give, to work appreciatively with whatever comes our way. If we really knew how unhappy it was making this whole planet that we all try to avoid pain and seek pleasure?how that is making us so miserable and cutting us off from our basic goodness?then we would practice as if our hair were on fire. There wouldn?t be any question of thinking we have a lot of time and we can do this later.
Yet when we begin to practice exertion, we see that sometimes we can do it and sometimes we can?t. The question becomes: How do we connect with inspiration? How do we connect with the spark and joy that?s available in every moment?
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Concentration involves something to grasp, something to hold onto. You are ?here? trying to concentrate on something ?there.? Rather than concentration, we practice mindfulness. We see what is happening there rather than developing concentration, which is goal oriented. Anything connected with goals involves a journey toward somewhere from somewhere. In mindfulness practice there is no goal, no journey; you are just mindful of what is happening there.
From The Myth of Freedom and the Way of Meditation by Chgyam Trungpa, page 60
Not everything is supposed to become something beautiful and long-lasting. Sometimes people come into your life to show you what is right and what is wrong, to show you who you can be, to teach you to love yourself, to make you feel better for a little while, or to just be someone to walk with at night and spill your life to. Not everyone is going to stay forever, and we still have to keep on going and thank them for what they’ve given us. — Emery Allen